A few months of updates.

It's summer and we've been running at full speed. We started in March with a trip to California to see family. We found a VRBO condo in La Jolla Shores and spent the trip at the beach, it was pretty awesome, we want to stay at the same place again. Then in April we headed to NY to see the family, it was still chilly up there but we had a nice time. During a travel break we got a few new baby chickens which Lane loved. Then we kicked off our May with a trip to Disney's Wilderness Campground, Key West and Bahia Honda to celebrate Lane and I's birthdays and Dave and I's anniversary (year 9!). It was an amazing trip. The camper was perfect for us and pulled fine once the weight was balanced out. Disney was magical - particularly the campground, though Magic Kingdom is pretty special. We loved the boat ride back and forth, fireworks, clean bathrooms, bike trails, shows....and Pony Rides! Little one rode her first pony! Key West was beautiful, though our favorite parts of it had nothing to do with Duvall Street. I liked the botanical garden and good food, Lane liked the Aquarium, Dave liked the bike riding and exploring. We got to Bahia Honda the last four nights of the trip and it blew us away. Perfect see to the bottom beaches that were shallow for Lane to play in, we got to take the paddleboard out, we got to find coconuts, grill, chill, wander, see stars. We took Lane to a turtle hospital for her birthday. Little turtle lover was cackling with excitement, particularly when the turtle helpers would pull them out of the water for a cleaning or treatment. She insists she will be a 'turtle doctor' one day and is still talking about the turtle hospital. It was the perfect family vacation, with bits and pieces for each one of us. I left wanting more. In late June I headed to San Diego with Lane for my sister's wedding - a one week trip where we did wedding festivities, saw lots of family, and even snuck in a beach trip. For July 4th we took the camper out to Tybee for patriotic celebrations and watched fireworks on the beach which was pretty sweet (Dave's mom came down and braved the camper with us). Last week was spent in Floyd, Virginia for our second trip to Floydfest. It didn't disappoint, with great food, great people and in a beautiful place. Last year we had a good time but got rained out prematurely so we were a little more prepared this time. Maybe next year we'll be confident enough to invite some other people to hang with us for a couple days of it. Besides the scenery, quiet moments in the camper and time spent together, my favorite part was watching my two year old head for the stage. She is a guitar loving, singing, dancing wonder. She'd head to the front, point at the guitars, wave to the singers. She's a nut and I love it. She serenaded us in the car for at least a quarter of the car trip.

All in all, it has been a beautiful few months. There is never enough time, but we are blessed to have been able to enjoy some good travel and catch up with family. With every up there is a down, and we had a great sadness a couple weeks ago. Sydney, our constant companion for the last 11 years, passed away. She had never been a very energetic dog, happy to lay on her bed for several hours at a time, watching outside pass by, but her energy level had depleted significantly and noticeably which prompted a vet appointment and xray which revealed her cancer. She was put on prednisone to give her some energy and hopefully put the cancer into remission. Her energy and appetite did increase for a time, but about two weeks ago she got very lethargic again. We knew it was time to let go when she couldn't walk anymore. Letting her go..... this link to Dave and I's beginning, our time together in California, the time she spent with me in college, the memories of teaching her to use a doggy door in NY (she still didn't care for it ), taking her on boat rides in our little wood boat, taking her camping, the fact that she hated wet feet and rain, the time we took her in bars in Savannah, long walks with her at Ft. Pulaski, introducing her to our baby, watching her interact with Lane.....next to losing my Grandfather, this was probably the greatest loss we've experienced together. She was, and always will be, our first baby, our first project together and despite her flaws she was a wonderful dog. Not a mean bone in her body. Never a bite, never a malicious growl. She was loved and petted and pampered until her last breath, at our house, with Neeko, Dave and I by her side. I am not anxious for another dog, and have devoted myself to making Neeko's life as good as possible. Ever the dog bone and toy hoarder, Sydney meant that he couldn't have bones and toys which he can have in abundance now. A sneaky diaper eater/stealth carpet pee'r, Syd meant that gates kept them sequestered in the kitchen mostly, now he is free to roam and is at my feet as I type this. Toward the latter part of her life, she wasn't much of a walker - and neither is he - but he easy to handle and I can ensure he gets a short walk daily. Sydney never failed to savor the moment. She loved her food, loved her pats, and always had a happy look or tail  wag for me. She was always a reminder to be happy, that life isn't that rough, to stop and smell/eat the flowers (I can plant more things on the deck now), and that when things get stressful or tiring to feel free to just lay down, wherever you are and no matter who is with you - even in the road - and lay down for rest. I could devote a book to funny Sydneyisms - from puppy on - to that fantastic Rhodesian Ridgeback. Rest in peace my big dog, and if you happen to be around my Grandfather, don't go near him because he doesn't like dogs and he might hit you with that big stick he carried on his walks.

Dave's job status has changed. He is no longer working for the Coastal Bank, which he was with since we moved to Savannah. The Coastal Bank was acquired by Ameris and he is now a lender once again. Ever positive and loyal, Dave is enthusiastic about his new company and pleased that he will be working with a good group from the Coastal Bank team. With change comes hard work, but I have no doubt he'll shine brightly in his new role.

Mandel Design is plugging along. The jobs keep coming in and I keep learning, growing and excelling as a landscape architect. I had no idea where this career would go, but being able to bring in income for my family, be creative and balance my life makes me feel like I made good choices. It is not without frustrations and uncertainties, but so far, I am truly enjoying my business and look forward to doing this the rest of my life....literally...I don't think that I will ever retire....I will be ancient and drawing as long as my hands work.

The bees are doing awesome this year. We have one hive that is amazing and one that is fair, but so far so good. We pulled a few gallons of honey in June and look forward to getting more this far. We have decided on the barter system for friends who want honey. It's not worth in cash the amount of blood, sweat and stings, so if you want some, make us something.

That pretty  much sums up the last few months. A few Lane highlights for her fans - she's a talker still. New sentences, songs, thoughts and questions every day. Her favorites:

Lane: 'What's Lane's favorite animal?'
Me: (pretending I have no idea) 'Is it..... kangaroo's?'
Lane: 'No'
Me 'Is it millipedes?'
Lane: 'Turtles!'
Me: 'Really? Wow! No Kidding'

She loves to point to things and ask 'What's that?'. Sometimes I can answer, sometimes I find myself trying to explain a stripe on a piece of carpet, but I am glad that she asks and I love doing my best to answer.

She tells Dave she missed him when he gets home from work. Usually he picks her up for a hug and now she's adding in a 'love you so much fuzzy daddy'. Yes, he is fuzzy daddy to her.

Her song repertoire (usually sang at high volume while strumming her purple ukele)" Twinkle Twinkle, Happy Birthday, You are my sunshine, We are the Dinosaurs, Pig on her head, good night, on top of spaghetti, and a few others. If you don't recognize some of those it is because they are by Laurie Berkner, a children's music artist. Dave and I feel like Laurie lives with us, sleeps with us, eats with us, showers with us.

She regularly hugs the dog, raids the pantry and reorganizes it, eats incredibly slowly, is getting better with a spoon, is fully and amazingly potty trained (no diapers even on the long car trip we just did!), likes to have a say in what she wears, and sometimes put on multiple pairs of panties. She also loves to be naked, pees outside sometimes, still loves turtles and points them out mercilessly, loves to freak me out in the pool with her fearless 'swimming' underwater and loves play doh. I am not a big fan of tv just yet, but she can watch music videos on youtube when we travel or in restaurants/errands. She loves this. It's extra special when she gets to cuddle with Daddy and watch 'videos' at night. Sleep is still not her thing, particularly alone, but I'm not in any big rush. She'll get better at that. She gives random hugs, is friendly to strangers, is  getting better at taking off and putting on her shoes and clothes and really likes her puzzles. I genuinely love being her mommy. We have so much fun.

Some pictures: Thanks to my mother in law for always having a camera, and to instagram for keeping me organized!

Busy?

I read an article recently about the word 'busy' (http://www.tylerwardis.com/busy-isnt-respectable-anymore/)....how it has transformed how we speak to eachother, how it sums up our whole lives, how it oversimplifies the catching up of friends....and I have vowed not to use the word busy anymore...because I want to be deeper and more thoughtful than that. So instead of using busy to explain why I haven't blogged in three months, I am going to explain what I've been doing. And just so you know, blogging for me is like a volcano or a geyser - my thoughts and stories and emotions build and build until I let it all out on here. If I blog once a week, the pressure stays low; but if I go as long as I have gone this time the pressure is extreme and I really have to set aside time to let it all out. Be prepared for a long one....maybe grab a cup of coffee (or wine) and some cheese (or some good organic 70% dark chocolate - our latest fave)..and settle in..

Thanks Angela Hopper Photography!

1.  Raising toddler Lane. This kid blows my mind. I was in the self checkout line at the grocery store the other day and Lane was in the cart seat thing behind me. I saw her start to stand up (which she's not supposed to because she could fall) and I told her firmly that she needed to sit (which she laughed at) so I strapped her in and told her it wasn't a game in my firmest Mommy voice. She turned her attention to a stranger behind us. The woman was smiling at her and by the time I was finished checking out, she was out of line visiting with Lane, who was in full on flirt mode, talking to her and trying to kiss her at this point. The woman told me how lucky I am, how sweet Lane is, and how fast it all goes by. I told her how lucky I feel, and I do. She belongs to the world and I have the privilege of raising her. She knows my neighbors, she visits the mailman, she gives hugs to family members she has only met once. She is learning to count, to use the potty, to make excuses at bedtime, to request 'okra' and 'pickles' at mealtime. To splash in puddles, to follow her shadow, to request her favorite music videos - the only tv she likes - which are mostly all completely inappropriate, to open packages, to walk the dogs. She has her favorite books and toys a plastic turtle, a plastic kitty and a plastic racoon. We spend over an hour every day outside; riding her bike, swinging, going to parks, finding and hording 'mail' (unwanted pennysavers) and riding in her wagon. Sometimes we have picnics in the open field across the street, and they almost always involve a ride on her tree, a big oak with low branches that she can site on. She hides our things in drawers and cupboards and the refrigerator, she builds big nests of her things and gets upset if I move them when she is around, she runs, she feeds snacks to her animals, she gets frustrated with me when I am not understanding her, she gets excited when Daddy gets a blanket out because that means cuddle time on the couch, she steals keys-phones-wallets-purses-bracelets-necklaces and wears/uses it all at the same time, she is getting better and better at using her fork, she says 'hi' to people and it makes me sad when people don't respond.

I hope I can keep up with her energy, encourage her enthusiasm and channel her passion. I feel like every day is an opportunity to teach her something, to listen to her, to play with her, to introduce her to something new. She and my marriage are my most important projects, my legacy, my life. 

2. Running my business. This is like nothing I have ever experienced. I have six or eight projects going at once. Some can be finished in a week, others will take months. Some pay the bills, others are thoughtful and intense. I do my billing, my drawing, my communications, my paperwork. I have about 10-15 hours of sitter time for Lane a week and that comprises all of the meetings that I can have, any quiet phone calls and some of the desk work. The rest is done on weekends when Dave is home, when she goes to sleep at night, or during nap time. I get calls from new clients and I want to tell them I cannot take anything else on, but then they tell me the project and I get excited and don't. Sometimes I can get everything done easily and other times it totally stresses me out, but I love doing what I am doing. 

3. Camping. We bought a pop up camper and  have been camping. Lane loves it, we love it. It's a win win. It's nothing fancy, but it has climate control and comfortable beds and a sink and that is all we need. We camped Hunting Island in South Carolina, we camped Tallulah Gorge in the Georgia Mountains and visited James Island outside of Charleston for Christmas. Lane can run, go to the playground, pick up rocks and sticks and we can sit by the fire when she goes to sleep at night. We go with friends and cook and drink and hike. Some people think I am crazy for taking a toddler, I think those people are crazy for not camping with their kids. Kids have a natural connection to 'side' (outside to Lane). It's such a natural thing to let them be to pick up rocks and sticks and explore.

Thank you Jade + Matthew Take Pictures!

I need to wrap this up, I'm using a nap time and little one is due to wake. I promise to blog more regularly, thank you to my faithful readers, friends and family.

Some more pictures of the last three months:

Squeezing one in

It's the calm before the storm. My child is napping. I should be cleaning. We are packed. My house is a total disaster. I met, I created, I drew, I invoiced, I thanked, I apologized. It has been going on for two weeks. The moment Lane is with her sitter, I am out the door to a meeting or sitting at my desk plugging away. It's a 4 coffee cup desk week - which is how you can tell I have been busy - they stack up because I forget to take them downstairs. Last night I saw them piled in the sink because my husband/baby daddy/CFO/cleaning staff had brought them all down stairs - along with the plate from my lunch. And in the midst of it all he ran an ultramarathon last weekend - 31.8 miles. I laughed when I saw them there, I know this habit drives him crazy but he knows I'm busy and doesn't say anything.

 

This morning I gave in and realized there was no possible way to get everything done before I take off for a much needed cousin visit,  so I am leaving my poor husband with this messy house - but deep down I sort of hope that when he finds the weeble wobbles and mini animals that Lane has left all over the house in weird places he will think of us and miss us. I apologized to my sitter that I have been a zombie - she said that is okay and that she knows I am preoccupied when I have that wide-eyed look. I am embarrassed that she can tell and so so grateful for her singing and playing and strolling with Lane. She works about 6-8 hours a week, sometimes more, sometimes less but between that help and nap time and working with little one in the office, I can get a lot done. Last week I took a phone call while being chased in circles by a toy lawn mower, it was a new high for us.

 

Yesterday I had dental work done, came home for Lane, then went to a meeting where I had to look and sound professional with what felt like a sock in my mouth from the numbness. It was crazy, but it came out okay. I swung back by the house after the meeting, picked up my little monkey and went to meet a friend to see Tibetan Monks doing a sand mural in a local museum. Millions of grains of sand in different colors. It was beautiful, they were peaceful in the middle of my craziness - that is until Lane grabbed one of those seatbelt material barricade things that rolls back into itself and it went 'snnnnapppp' in the middle of the atrium. I figured we better go, so we went to the park and had an Italian soda and some gelato. That is how it goes right now - eighty miles an hour to a screeching halt to take a toddler to sniff a flower. We love Thursdays because the newspaper delivers a free segment that no one wants or reads - except Lane. We take her cozy coupe out and she collects them all, one by one, and puts them in her car.

 

A couple of weeks ago our sitter had a friend sub-in for her for the morning. She's a special lady that ran a Montessori school for a long time and Lane likes her lots. As she was leaving, she turned and said 'You know how lucky you are, right?'. I do. I am the luckiest woman in the world. My sweet family, our health, our home, my passion/my business, this beautiful City.

 

Another photographer friend took some pictures of Lane (below), and a different photographer friend took this one of us together after Dave's race. So grateful for pictures...so grateful for friends.

 

 



 

Strictly Baby

This has been a bad week. Tragedy struck our family and we've all been reeling a little. It is always a little sad living far from family but it is extremely hard when you'd like to just give a hug and sit silently together - because there are no words. Makes me want to treasure each moment with this little girl and my little family.

To that end, I use this blog like a record book for us, so excuse me while I post strictly about Lane because I know one day I will not remember what she was like, right now at this moment.

Lane took her first steps on Father's Day - right before 13 months. When she first started walking it was half crawling, half walking and now she's almost running. Crawling is completely gone. She has this crazy vocabulary all of the sudden (all done, bye bye, chicken, dog, Neeko, Barbara - our neighbor, Minda - our other neighbor, Bobo - her friend, mama, dada, bird, up, open, mailbox, blower - we do yard work together, baby, toes, ear, nose, mouth, necklace...it goes on and on) and she learns new words every day. She's sweet. She gives hugs and kisses and she wants to cuddle. She wants to be up in your arms all the time (uppa, uppa) and I will continue to carry her as long as I can. She loves her carriers still and sometimes when she's super clingy I just put her in there and go on with my day. My neighbor came outside and took a picture of us mowing the yard together yesterday. She is getting her other side of molars, so since there was very little playing by herself, we mowed.

Shy hands: My girl is not very shy, she loves kind faced strangers and new places - always willing to explore. It may take her a couple minutes to get her bearings and access the situation, but then she's happy - like at Daddy's office - where she wanders around playing with office supplies and things that people hand her. That being said, when she's a little timid about something she clasps her hands together by her belly or her back and sort of sways....'should I touch this?', 'should I trust this person'? It's sweet. I'm sure it will be gone soon like so many things from her first year.

Separation Anxiety: It strikes unexpectedly and without warning. She will wave bye bye to me when I leave her with her sitter or with daddy, but I'll get up to grab a load of laundry when we've been playing for a little while and she loses her stuff. When it strikes she is incapable of moving to follow me wherever it is that I'm going, she just stands there, paralyzed, crying. Usually it involves a bit of clumsiness and a dramatic fall down as well. SA peaks around 18 months, so we're just trying to ease her fears until then. Yes, Mommy will return from the laundry room, it's okay.

All Done: She tells us she is 'all done' all the time. She also tells me that I am 'all done' all the time. If my conversation is taking too long, she tells me 'all done, bye bye'. If I am working at my desk too long 'all done'. If we've been at the grocery store too long 'all done'. The first thing I hear on the monitor when she wakes up from her nap 'all done' then 'open' when she gets to the door to her room. Done with bath time? 'all done'. Done eating 'all done'. This was the one sign language thing that stuck....a little too well, but it's nice at the same time.

I love being Lane's mommy. I have no doubt that she will continue to amaze and challenge me as she grows up. Thanks for indulging a mommy.

A few recent pictures:

So I found an old style cozy coupe in rough shape on Craigslist. Dave thought I was nuts but there is this 'pimp your cozy coupe' trend on the internet...and I am always looking for a re-use project....

Before

During

After

Floydfest

A couple weeks ago we headed to Floydfest, an bluegrass/rock/folk music festival in Floyd, Virginia. We left around noon on a Wednesday, loaded up with camping gear, our radio flyer all terrain wagon, and comfy music festival clothes for all. Lane napped for the first couple hours of the trip and then woke up and played until we arrived in Mount Airy, North Carolina to the vintage Mayberry Motor Inn, a 50's style roadside motel in the town that Mayberry was based on. I'm not a big fan or anything, but there was a huge collection of Aunt Bea memorabilia.  Lane liked the grass, we liked the clean and comfortable small room. We got take out bbq and hunkered down for a quiet night before heading to Floyd in the morning. The new hotel criteria includes outdoor space that is close enough to the room that the baby monitor will work so that we can sit outside while little one sleeps. This has worked for us a couple times, and it came through again so that we had some pavilion alone time - just a little bit - but it makes us feel like people and not just parents when we can enjoy a beer at night under a pavilion.

Feeling rested, we headed out for Floyd. It was crisp and cool and green and we stopped for a breakfast sandwich at a fantastic diner/gas station where everyone was friendly, plus I think the man standing next to us placing his order was the real Santa Clause - so Lane got a chance to charm him.

 

'Driving' - no, the car wasn't moving

 

We arrived at the 'Alpha Lot' parking area with about a thousand other people around 10:00 in the morning and were guided to our grassy parking space nestled between two girls who were excited that we had a baby with us and a couple who had way more stuff than we did. Dave unloaded and packed the wagon while I backpacked Lane up to the gear check line. I found my way to the 'orange' line to save us a space and began to survey the crowd. There were lots and lots of families, lots of baby boomers, lots of college kids, a few old-timers and a few shirtless music festival junkies complete with hula hoops, body paint, ukuleles and glow sticks. By the time Dave got into line with us I had found a Mom to talk to there with her 18 year old son - she said music was the one thing they had in common still, which made a lot of sense. I noted that she looked fantastic, toned and firm and young. I figured she had her son when she was like 20, but later found out she was my age which made me feel like I'll still be cool when Lane is that age. The gear check line was long and it was hot. Lane fell asleep in her carrier and slept until after we checked out gear and were on the shuttle taking us to the festival site and I was glad. Following a new walker around who loves to look in bags and coolers would have been a little rough.

 

Helping

 

Staging

 

 

Riding Mommy

 

Riding Mommy while Mommy pulls the wagon in line

 

We arrived at the festival site with our gear around 1:30. The main entrance gives way to a bunch of little shops with crafts and art and tie dye and exhibits and the prime wooded camp area which we walked through thinking we might just settle in if we found a spot. We didn't find a spot. We kept walking. We made fun of people who were camping on a slope. We kept walking. We started to notice that much of the camping was on a slope. We kept walking. We started downhill. We realized that things were pretty crowded and that we better find a spot. We changed our standards. The spot we found was on a slope - a big one - but we set up our tent, changed clothes and tried not to think about how we were going to sleep. So we went to the beer tent next to the stage and let Lane run around while we relaxed and listened to music and we knew that this was going to be awesome.

 



Cruising the beer tent



 

After the beer tent we headed to Children's Universe to see what that was all about. It was fantastic. There was a stage in there with a great band, clean sand boxes with toys, a play ship to climb on, a nursing tent, dress up for the older kids and lots and lots of families. I saw one pregnant lady with FIVE other kids there! I felt like a lightweight. Lane loved the sand box and the other kids. Mommy and Daddy loved letting her run for a bit.

 

Our first big concert was the Lumineers. It was incredible. The stage the music, the people, the glowsticks. Lane decided that Dave should put her to sleep, so he had the sleeping baby with him (with her earmuffs) for most of the concert. I was okay with this.

 

Cool stage.

 

Daddy + baby + earmuffs

 

We headed back to the tent about midnight and settled in on the side of our own little mountain. Trying to sleep whilst sliding downhill proved difficult for Dave and I, Lane slept fine. Not sure if it was the crisp mountain air, the excitement of the day ahead or just plain old positive attitudes, but we headed out the next morning like we'd had a full night's sleep. Dave even went for a run in the morning. After an awesome local breakfast, some coffee and a little bit of music, we headed back to the booze tent for Lane's nap.

 

 

No sleep, no makeup but feeling happy!

 

After her nap, we went back to the tent and prepared for shower time. Showers were hot and clean and in wood outside stalls. The line was short and we felt refreshed. I hippied out with a flowered dress and a naked baby - brought everything but a diaper.

 

 

After our shower we headed to hear a smaller band and get a good place for an intimate concert and conversation at the Workshop Porch Stage with John Butler. He was fantastic, and our spot was worth the wait. Lane was a very good girl, dancing and playing with random objects from Dave's backpack. If you haven't listened to the John Butler Trio, I suggest you do.

 

 

 

After the concert, we went and met he and his band and got signatures from the band on Baby Lane's picture in the FloydFest program. Pretty cool.

 

 

After all that excitement it was time to eat again. We had grassfed burgers, or maybe it was the day we had these awesome stir fry vegan noodles - I can't remember - but all the food and local wine was incredible. After dinner we went back to the tent for a clothes change and to put Lane in her pj's and then back to a different stage to see Donavon Frankenreiter - another one of our favorites. This was by far my favorite stage and he put on a great show, and Lane went to sleep.

 

The stage is on the bottom right...not a bad sunset.

Chillin pre-concert

Listening to music with Daddy.

  

Sleeping with Mommy and glow sticks.





After that concert we headed over for the big (thousands of people) John Butler concert which was fantastic. Little one slept, we rocked out. Then it was time to sleep. Dave was going to head to a couple more good acts, but we were beat. It started raining when we got back to our tent. It rained all night. The tent leaked. We decided to go in the morning because we were on a slope with nowhere dry to sit and ride out a whole day of forecasted additional rain - and we had very few dry clothes. I put up an umbrella in the tent and managed to keep Lane and some clothes dry. Lane slept in her carrier while I packed some stuff out and took refuge in the nursing tent. Dave packed up the tent and wheeled the wagon out. We were one of the first shuttles out that morning, good thing because the mud in the parking lot was already so thick our Prius was sliding all over the place. We missed a couple more good concerts, but we had already gotten a lot of good music and happy memories out of Floydfest, so it was okay. We headed to Charlotte for the night, and then we headed home. We plan to go back again next year - better prepared for rain and knowing the routine - if the lineup is as good. Thanks Floydfest for an awesome festival and we'll see you next year!